By: Christine Varichak
So you have a friend who’s going through a difficult season of life, they call you up for a venting/crying session. Ok, this friend is a woman. Men don’t call friends to cry…vent yes, cry…no. I’ve recognized the best friend I ever had gave me the best advice ever…Nothing. She literally listened, and let me sob it out. Because no one can come over to my house (I’m a single Mom of 2) and teach me how-to’s for every problem going on in my life right now. EG:Managing my life with two kids. I’ve come to realize the most dangerous friend you can have is the “fixer”. You know the type, the “Tell me the problem so I can tell you what I would do if I were you” friend. I can say this because I am a recovering fixer. This friend thinks she is helping everyone, but is helping no one. She wears herself out dolling advice she is in no position to give because she’s not you…
Now don’t misunderstand me, no one needs the “whiny girl” friend. Calling five nights a week complaining about her dumb husband, or terrible boss, unruly kids, etc. That’s a hot mess…Or as I like to call her…the whiner baby. I remember because yes, I am also a recovering whiner baby.
The ideal for us, ladies, is to be a good friend so that we have good friends. Listening to one another, leading our girlfriends right to the source who can really minister to us, God. As much as we see sister Sally and her seemingly perfect family who have it all-together; offering us advice on how we, too can be perfect…the answer should always be; “Lets pray and take this to The Problem Solver, The Holy Spirit”. That’s where the breakthroughs come, and when we get delivered at the end of the day.